dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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