I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
is it fun? or sober?
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