Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Randomize
