how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
