Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
