Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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