If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
