then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
