You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
