3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
