butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
