Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
