The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
