just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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