You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize