Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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