The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
