i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
