I showed him my bush... on skype.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
We had sex on a dog bed..
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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