I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
