Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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