nut hugger
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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