He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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