I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
it glows. i had to have it.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize