Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
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