Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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