You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Terrible idea I love it
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
