ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
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