you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
