she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
