I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm passing your future prison.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
