I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
