Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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