these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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