Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
