She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
