come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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