So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
