you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
