Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Randomize
