i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
