I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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