My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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