I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
