I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Randomize
