just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
