i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
