Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
