she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
