And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
